


Wildest Dreams // hyungwonho

by Eimi_nee



Series: Hyungwonho [1]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Light Angst, M/M, Romance, Summer Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2019-01-05 18:55:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12195711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eimi_nee/pseuds/Eimi_nee
Summary: He never answered my question. But I knew. I knew that, whatever I felt, he was feeling it too.





	1. Translations (French)

French translation : https://www.wattpad.com/user/Akina_fr


	2. Part One

A teenager's summer, heat and sweat mixed with love and recklessness - just what I needed after this stressful final year of high school. I didn't really have anything planned at the beginning - just hanging out with my nerdy friends and help my father with his jam business.

Nothing very excited, actually, but pretty relaxing, and that's what mattered.

That's what was going through my mind when my eyes were desperately staring at my smoking dumb old car that had the nerve of breaking down in the middle of nowhere. Of course it had to be on a road no one ever takes. And of course my phone ran out of battery a few minutes ago. How lucky of me.

I was only going home after a perfect little afternoon at my friend Hyunwoo's where we played games and ate so many popcorns that we both felt sick at the end of our happy little time. I didn't bring my charger to prevent my phone from dying, and here I was, cooking under the hot sun of a summer afternoon in the middle of nowhere.

A few hours had passed, and luckily enough for me, I had brought two bottles of water so I wasn't dehydrating. I was losing hope though, and I was about to start walking to the nearest village that was about seven kilometers from where I was, when a red modern car arrived in my direction. Jumping on the road to make the car stop, I was regaining hope of not having to walk several hours under that burning sun. The car did parked next to my poor car, and the owner opened their door and jumped out of the machine and... Oh, fuck me ! Why was I so unlucky today ? Why did it have to be him ?

Shin Hoseok. Or Wonho, for short. The most popular bastard in the entire town schools.

I grunted when our eyes locked, and crossed my arms on my not-very-muscular chest.

"- Hey darling, he sang with a smile. D'you need any help here ?"

Rolling my eyes, I stopped myself from making any sarcastic remarks and simply answered with a "yes, that would be very nice of you, thank you" that nearly made me vomit all over his brand new shoes.

"- Jump in, but under one condition, he said with his common confident smile on his face.

\- Which is ?

\- Go to a party with me tonight.

\- Excuse me ? I started laughing, convinced that he wasn't serious. But apparently, he was.

\- I was on my way to Jooheon's party, and since I'm pretty sure you don't have anything else planned tonight, I wanted to spice up your holidays, he explained nonchalantly, his horrible smile still glued on his lips.

\- First of all, that's very rude of you. Second of all, you're still right, but thanks, I'm not a party guy.

\- Okay, then enjoy your time here !"

My mind was going faster than ever when I saw him going back to his car and nearly leaving me alone again.

"- Wait ! I let out, realizing that not being a party guy was not something I should let take away my only chance of going home.

\- Jump in."

And there I was. In Wonho's car. Going to a party with the one every knew in town, and about to meet his friends who I considered jerks as well.

This wasn't going to end well from the start, but I planned to stay on the couch all night and play with my phone (maybe I could borrow a charger ?) until it was a decent time for me to go home. I seriously didn't need a party right now, but I couldn't let my only hope of going home slip away from me.

Rock music was blasting out of Wonho's car radio, which I didn't mind. It was the only thing, with the growling sound of the engine, breaking the awkward silence between us. Wonho didn't seem to mind - he was singing along and his signature smile was still on his lips. I let out a sigh, and fifteen minutes later, we arrived at Jooheon's house. I waited for Wonho to make a move to close my eyes for a few seconds and mentally prepare myself for the hours that were coming.

I wasn't ready.

Getting out of the car, we were welcomed by a muffled music sound that was coming from the house. Wonho's eyes were on me, I could feel them burning my face - but I refused to let mine do the same on his. He smirked, and signed me to go after him. I followed him nonchalantly, and he opened the front door.

This already promised to be a long night.

People were already smashed and high on whatever they smoked. This was not my idea of a good night, but this was my only chance of going home, since it was impossible for me to walk from this distance.

"- Hey, who let this loser come here ? I suddenly heard. That's when I realized every eyes were on me. This was not a pleasant feeling, let me tell you.

\- Me", Wonho shouted back with laughter in his throat. Everyone laughed back, and I made my way to the bathroom to hide from embarrassment.

It hadn't been five minutes since I entered the bathroom that I heard someone knocking - or hitting - on the door.

"- Hyungwon ? Come out, people are waiting."

Wonho. Of course it had to be him. With a sigh, I finally went out, still not ready to face the party.

"- Hey, you okay ? he asked me gently, his eyes showing genuine worry. I didn't know what to think.

\- Uh, yes, yeah I am.

\- I'm sorry if they made you uncomfortable. But hey, let me offer you a drink."

I had no idea why he was suddenly so nice when he'd always been a jerk with me - but I could not let it pass. I had to make a benefit out of this situation, and I agreed for a drink.

Or maybe two.

I was completely wasted. And the worst thing was, I didn't even care.

I never drank a lot - I was the nerdy type, so I was never invited to those kinds of party. Of course I had beers before, but not vodka. And at that time, it seemed like the tastiest drink I'd ever had.

I was sitting on the couch alone, my drink in one hand and a goofy smile onto my lips. The people around me were as drunk as me, and high - though I didn't smoke anything, I felt like I had. It was the best feeling of the world. I felt happy, as if everything disappeared : my worries, my problems... and my asociality, apparently, because as soon as Wonho appeared in my vision, I jumped out of the couch and ran to him.

"- Wonho, I called, running into his arms.

\- Hey Hyungwon, he answered with a flirtatious wink. I could tell he was as drunk as me, maybe even more, because he hugged back.

\- I'm drunk, I said with a silly little laugh, my eyes closing without me noticing.

\- D'you mind if I take you outside ? It's a little bit hot in here.

\- Are we going stargazing ?"

So that's what we did - we went outside, sat down on one of the benches and he pulled out a cigarette. He offered me one, but I refused, feeling the alcohol kicking in with bad stomach cramps. Putting his arm around me, he pulled me closer to him and I could feel him shivering under the cold night breeze.

After a few minutes, and after he finished his cigarette, he suddenly turned to me, and his shiny big dark eyes studied my own figures. Closer, and closer, our faces were only a few centimeters apart when he decided the distance was too unbearable and glued our lips together. His were cold, but warmed mine with their movements. My heart was beating fast when his fingers ran through my soft blonde hair that I had dyed a few days before. His lips detached themselves from mines and went kissing my eyelids, my red cheeks, my neck, to return to my pink lips where smoke was escaping in this cold night. I knew it wasn't a good idea to be making out with him, but it felt so right. I didn't know if it was because of the alcohol or because I really wanted to, but I returned all of his gentle kisses. His tongue was playfully entering my mouth when we heard it, and jumped apart from each other.

"- Wonho !"

It was a cry of anger, desperation, and confusion. We both knew who it was, and I felt stupid forgetting about her.

Wonho's girlfriend. Of course. He ran after her when she walked away, letting me alone, aware of every thing around me : how the tree branches danced along the music of the wind, the dull sounds of the steps people were taking around me, and how the cold temperature felt like needles on my hot cheeks.

I can't believe I kissed him. I can't believe this happened.


	3. Part Two

He followed her, and of course he would follow her, so why was I feeling so bad ? It's not like I was his boyfriend, but it was his girlfriend and oh my god did I want to be his boyfriend ? Because that would be fucked up, and I was straight, I was pretty sure of that. So why was I jealous of her ? I felt really guilty about the kiss. I shouldn't have let him do that to me ; yet I enjoyed it. That, I blamed on the alcohol.

But why would he kiss me in the first place ?

This situation was fucked up and I needed to go home as soon as possible. I decided to wait a bit to see if he would come back to take me home, so I waited. And waited. Until finally someone I'd never seen before showed up and said Wonho told him to take me home. It could have been a lie, this person could just want to take me at his place and do crazy shit to me but I was too tired to care. Maybe Wonho really asked him, and I decided to trust the guy.

Turned out to be a great idea, because I was home a few minutes later, with no trouble at all.

I was feeling really hot and sticky from all the sweat I'd been accumulating throughout the day, so I took a rapid fresh shower and went to bed as soon as I could, falling into a dreamless and restless sleep for the rest of the night.

I'm picking you up at 8pm, be ready.

I stared at my phone, clueless about what he was trying to say. It had been nearly a week since the party, and Wonho and I didn't talk to each other once. We had no reason to, and I didn't know whether or not he remembered the kiss we shared. We were monday night, two weeks after the beginning of summer break, and I had of course no plans for the night. Plus, his text did make me feel as if I didn't have any choice. Those were the reasons I was now changing my clothes into something a bit more classy, or at least I tried to convince myself these were the reasons why.

The truth is I wanted to see Wonho - I wanted to know if he remembered anything, if it meant something to him, or if I should just forget everything.

I finally stopped myself after I tried on a new pair of black ripped jeans I got, a plain white tee-shirt and black sneakers. I decided to add a thin black beanie on my blonde hair, just to make myself look a bit more relaxed and chill.

I spent the next thirty minutes wondering where he would take me to, and why. Mostly why. Were we supposed to talk about what happened ? Or leave it as it was ? The minutes were slowly getting closer to the time he said he'd be picking me up. I was too clueless about the whole thing, and the endless questions were dancing so fast in my head, that I didn't really realized the time had passed when I heard my doorbell go.

And there he was, with his stupid brown hair, his stupid dark eyes, and his stupid confident smile I wanted to erase. We spent at least a whole minute staring at each other when he finally opened his mouth.

"- You ready ?

\- Always, but first explain to me what's going on.

\- Not now, smart head. You'll see when we arrive."

With a small sigh, I picked up my keys and closed the door on us, letting him decide what the rest of my night would be made of.

After a fifteen minutes ride, that had been extremely quiet and awkward, we finally arrived at the beach.

"- What are we doing here ? Are you trying to drown me or something ?

\- Shut up and enjoy."

There were already a few people sitting on the sand, and while Wonho was explaining to me that they only expected two or three persons more, we walked to them and to the campfire that they all surrounded. Some were sitting on their jackets, some brought big plaids where two or three persons could sit at once. I followed Wonho to the empty side of the fire, where he landed his own white blanket and gestured me to sit down. So that's what I did.

But even though Wonho was by my side all night, I couldn't help but feel lonely. He didn't seem to care at all about me, and everyone was talking to everyone... except me. I was left all alone, wondering why he brought me here in the first place. I took advantage of him coming back from picking up a second beer bottle for himself and decided to ask him. What did I have to lose in the first place ? My ride home ? As if I cared.

"- Wonho ?

\- Yes ?

\- Why did you bring me here anyway ? I wondered out loud after a sigh.

\- Oh", he let out after slowly sitting down. "I guess I wanted an answer.

\- An answer ? But on what ?

\- On that night. But you agreed to go here with me, so I guess my question's answered.

\- And what's the answer may I ask ? I was starting to get really pissed at him.

\- You. You're the answer."

I stared at him, confused, when a sweet melody started on my right. Someone I didn't know had pulled out an acoustic guitar and, as much cliché it sounded, I smiled. I didn't know what I was feeling, but I was feeling it. And it hadn't happened since a few years. People were taking turns for singing, and it was soon my turn... to say no. No way I'd sing in front of strangers. The person next to me finished the song, and Wonho smiled at me when every pair of eyes were on me.

Oh no. I could see where it was going.

The guy with the guitar started a song I luckily knew, but I couldn't get myself to sing. I closed my eyes and realized I was shaking, until a warm hand caught mine. Opening my eyes again, I could see Wonho's eyes reflecting the flames of the fire in front of us, and his signature smile was now replaced by a sweet and calming one.

"- Sing", he whispered.

So I did. I first started humming a bit, and I finished singing my heart out with my eyes closed. I had requested a song that was close to my heart, and I could feel Wonho's squeeze on my cold hand, but I didn't care. I didn't care that everyone was probably laughing at my cracking voice, or that I kept forgetting some words.

The song ended with my eyes being wet, but I tried to hold my tears in, not wanting to show how much this song meant to me. When I opened my eyes, I saw every faces staring at me, and no one even said anything. I felt judged, I felt guilty for letting my emotions guide me, so I stood on my shaking legs and walked out of the circle.

I walked until I couldn't walk anymore, and I could still see the fire, but I couldn't hear them, and that was the goal.

I stood there, watching the sea, listening to its song, letting the wind dry the cold tears on my cheeks.

"- You were great."

I jumped, surprised, and turned myself to the owner of the voice.

Wonho.

"- Hi, uhm, nah you don't have to act nice to reassure me over the fact that I just humiliated myself in front of-

\- You didn't.

\- What ?

\- You heard me. You have a really nice voice, Hyungwon."

That was the first time he ever said my name so sweetly, so I knew he meant it. His eyes were shining with pride, and he took my hand in his, rubbing my palm to make sure it stayed warm.

"- Thank you."

He smiled. I did too.

We stayed there, watching the waves crushing down on the sand in front of us, hand in hand.

"- Thank you, he murmured.

\- For what ?"

He never answered my question. But I knew. I just didn't want to be the only one thinking that this, this exact moment, was the start of something new, that would either make me the happiest guy in the world, or crush me down like the waves we were staring at.


	4. Part Three

Crazy.

That's what I thought they were when I arrived at the meeting point I had with Wonho, not expecting at all to see some of his friends standing in front of a wall, paint spray bottles in their hands. Wonho did tell me to dress in old clothes I didn't care damaging, but that ?

It was the middle of the night, and we were about to tag a wall. And the worst thing about that ? I didn't care. I didn't care that the cops might come and arrest us. I didn't care that this paint would probably stay on this wall for a long time. I didn't care, because for once, I was doing something that people would never expect of me. I was that smart and nice little child growing up, and disobeying like this made adrenaline flow in my veins. I secretly hoped more people were there to witness the birth of a new me.

It felt lame, but also so right.

Seeing me accepting a paint spray bottle made Wonho smirk, as if he expected me to refuse and go home. And truly, I expected myself to do so when I first saw his friends. But I smiled back to him, and listened carefully to the guy that was explaining to me how it was supposed to be done.

And I sprayed. I was never a good drawer, so I was a bit anxious of how it would turn out, but it did look amazing. I only painted a few words, and tried decorating them, but it still looked nice. And Wonho's smile made me feel like he also thought it was great. As he was silently staring at the two words I tagged, I observed him. I took in his features, his full lips, his straight nose, and his gorgeous maroon eyes. He still had that smirk drawn on his lips, and his gaze turned to me.

"- Wildest Dreams ? he murmured, referencing to my tag.

\- The craziest summer of my life", I tried to explain.

I could see his smirk turn in a genuine smile as he hid his face to my gaze. I chose those two words to describe my life at this point. Wildest, for him - his actions, his thoughts, his looks... he seemed so wild to me, so free, as if he could do everything and anything. Dreams, for me. Because I was still waiting for life to gave me a sign, to tell me my hopes weren't for anything. And somewhere in my heart, maybe I believed Wonho was my sign.

After everyone finished their tags, Wonho called it a night and told me to get in the car. Expecting him to drive me home, I got comfy in the seat. We didn't talk for the whole ride, but when he parked the car, I got confused. This wasn't my street, and this wasn't my home. This wasn't even a house, and I turned my gaze to Wonho.

"- Last time, when we went outside, he declared referencing to the first party he brought me to, you said you wanted to go stargazing."

Still confused, I followed him in the building and to the elevator. When we went out, the night sky was still above our heads, clear and cloudless. The stars were shining for us, and the light breeze made the temperature bearable. It was a nice summer night, just like the night we spent on the beach.

We walked towards the edge, and leaned on the barrier so we could get comfortable while watching the view.

"- It's gorgeous, I murmured.

\- I know, he said back, and I had no idea if his gaze was on the view, or on me.

\- Thank you, I whispered again, my eyes detaching from the city to his face.

\- For what ?"

I never answered the question, but I felt like he knew, because he smiled warmly at me.

Grabbing his bag, he took out some cheap fireworks he had probably bought in a little party store. His eyes went back to mines, and I smiled, giving him my autorisation. So he lit them up, and we laid down on the cold stone to watch them burst. He took my cold hand to warm it up, and after the fireworks went out, he started murmuring the stuff he probably hold back for this whole time.

"- I don't know why I keep asking you to come to parties when I know you don't like them. I don't know why I can't stop seeing your face in front of my eyes when you're not even with me. I'm obsessed by how mesmerizing your smile is. How your eyes shine with tiny stars when you sing. How your hand fits perfectly in mine. How soft your lips felt that night, and how fast you blush whenever I catch you staring at me.

\- What are you trying to say ? I asked softly.

\- I think... I think I'm obsessed with you. And I'm obsessed by this summer, and I don't want it to stop.

\- Then it's never going to stop."

He sighed, and got up, leaving me on the floor. His hand was gone from my grip, and it felt so empty.

Waiting for me to properly get up, He grabbed me by the waist and slowly pulled me into a kiss. It was the first since that party night, but it was even better this time - all I could feel was how soft and warm his lips felt against my cold cheeks. His fingers were in my hair, caressing them as if he wanted to reassure me. My eyes were closed, and my legs were trembling from my fast heartbeat, but I didn't care. I didn't even care about the burning smell coming for the rest of the fireworks.

But he pulled away again, ending the kiss and taking me aback.

"- But dreams do end", he whispered, his teary eyes avoiding my own gaze.  


	5. Part Four

It had been a few days since that rooftop date, and Wonho hadn't texted me. I didn't know if I had to do it first, but it was getting me worried over his last words. He never said anything else besides them, when he dropped me off that night. I wished he had. I was confused, worried, and hurt that he never explained.

My life was back to normal. I helped my dad, I went to see Hyunwoo, and some of my other friends. My life was back to its boring days. I sighed getting up, and made my way to the kitchen to make myself breakfast. I decided to stay simple and cooked myself some eggs, because I wasn't feeling that hungry. I was planning to go back to the beach with Hyunwoo later on, because we heard it would be a bit windy so it would allow us to lie on the sand without feeling too hot. I jumped quickly in the shower, and dressed myself with cosy clothes : a simple black shirt with beige shorts. I checked my phone one last time, sighed again, and put it in my bag, deciding to forget about it for the day. I didn't want my summer to get sad just because of a jerk who played with my feelings.

My guess was that Wonho made a bet with his friends that he could seduce me and made me kiss him. I was pretty sure I was right, because why else would he get close to me in the first place ?

I arrived at the beach one hour later, and spotted Hyunwoo with a bit of difficulty. There was already quite a few people on the sand, even if it was still early. We weren't the only ones who got that idea.

"- Hey, I said, spreading out my towel on the sand.

\- How are ya ?" my friend asked, not really waiting for an answer.

We laid down for a few hours, without really talking about anything. We weren't much talkers, but I had too much in my mind and he noticed it.

"- Okay Hyungwon, I've been ignoring your mumbling for the past hour, but it's getting on my nerves. Do you want to talk about it ?

\- Hyunwoo ?

\- Yes ?

\- Have you ever dated someone ? the question must had taken him aback because he took a few seconds to answer.

\- No, but I was close, one time, he paused, and continued after noticing my staring. She was that gorgeous student working for the school library. She noticed me reading a book she had already finished, and we started talking. I really liked her, and I would have asked her out if another guy didn't beat me in time."

I nodded, surprised. He had never talked about it, so I didn't know - but it seemed like it still hurted him, so I didn't dare asking anything.

"- Why are you asking that though ?

\- It's just... I met someone, we kissed and all, but he hasn't contacted me for a week.

\- He ?

\- Yeah... That person appears to me a "he".

\- Oh, okay. Well first of all, did you say anything that could have pissed him off ?

\- Not that I reckon."

I could see he was confused as well.

"- I really don't know, Hyungwon. Have you tried texting him ?

\- No, I... I didn't want to appear desperate.

\- Text him."

I stared at him for a few seconds, before pulling out my phone. I was about to text him when my phone buzzed in my hand, displaying his name on the screen.

_I need to see you._

"- Well ?

\- It's Wonho. He wants to see me.

\- Wonho ? Wait, is that your guy ? Did you make out with Wonho, that jerk who made fun of us all year ?

\- I guess I have a lot of explaining to do, right ?

\- Yes, he sighed, but go. Don't make him wait."

I thanked him, full of gratitude towards my best friend. He meant a lot to me. I grabbed my car keys in my bag and made my way toward the vehicle. I texted Wonho back, asking where we should meet up, and drove all the way to the building we last saw each other. I saw him as soon as my eyes became accustomed to the brightness of the sun shining upon us.

"- Wonho ?"

Startled, he turned to me, his eyes red and puffy. I could see he had cried, and I didn't know why. Not sure I wanted to know, though.

"- What happened ? I still asked, worried. Why did you want to see me ?

\- I'm going away.

\- What ? Wait, where ? For how long ?

\- We need to stop seeing each other. It's not right. And I don't want you to know where I'm going.

\- Was it all a lie ?"

I was sobbing by that time of our conversation.

"- I just have one question. Do you like me ? Or was it all a lie ? Was it a dare you had with your friends to break my heart and make fun of me again ?

\- Yes."

I didn't know to which question he answered, but in my unconfident heart, I knew it was to the dare question.

He was walking away now, and I couldn't stop him. I knew he wouldn't stay, because it was all a lie, and I was crying, and he was too.

"- Wonho..."

He stopped, still showing his back to me. He didn't want me to see him crying, and I didn't even know why he was crying in the first place.

"- I'm sorry."

And then he was gone, leaving the ghost of a perfect summer behind him. I could still smell his scent, his deodorant mixed with a strong smell of the sea, and I was sure that if I held out my hand in front of me, I would be able to grab him, to make him stay.  
But he was already gone.

And with him, all my dreams of finally trusting someone.

I stayed on that rooftop for about one hour, before making my way to my house. My cheeks were wet, but I stopped crying minutes ago. I opened my mail box, checking if there was any important stuff in there, and found a letter written to me. I didn't recognize the handwriting, so as soon as I got in my bedroom, I opened the letter.

And as I read those words, my heart broke into million of pieces, all shattered on the floor in front of me, and my tears started to fall again.

 _Please remember me. And this summer. Don't forget us, and wait for me._  


	6. Sequel

The sequel is up ! It's available in my other works, and it's called Polaroid Picture :)


End file.
